Every time I think about describing how bipolar II works it crazy thing in my brain, I automatically start by humming the lines sung by the Duke in Moulin Rouge.
Here's a link: "It's a little bit funny...this feeling inside" Spectacular, Spectacular
Poor man was told the girl actually loves him, and acts like a goofy idiot because of it...
There's been something that has been simmering around in my brain for a while, ever since I started talking to autists and their experience with something called Sensory Processing Disorder. What happens to them when experiencing sensations seems really similar to how I experience feelings with bipolar.
There are difficulties of modulation - it's too strong, too loud, exhausting, too weak, too quiet, ephemeral.
What really got to me was the question of - what happens to a person when they cannot experience the world reliably through sound, vision, touch, balance?
It's the profoundly unreliable experience that really got to me. I get that with an understanding that prickles along my skin, aches in my bones.
What happens to me because I can't reliably gauge whether something will make me happy or sad? Or -too happy- or -too sad-? Or have any feeling at all?
There's been additional insight into SPD actually being a THING, since the oh-so-lovely invention of fMRI's. I really hope they are getting bipolar brains under those electric microscopes.
Sensory Processing Disorder: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sensory_processing_disorder
Intense World Theory Interview: http://www.wrongplanet.net/article419.html
Intense World Theory Science-y stuff: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2518049/
SPD Study Science-y stuff: http://www.plosone.org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pone.0039906